In the spirit of celebrating wonderful dads, now is the perfect time to start thinking about FATHERHOOD. What is it that you love the most about your father? What part of parenting did your father do better than your Mom? How did your Daddy rock his fatherhood?
I bet we all have answers to it because if you are a Mom reading this blog, your father was the first man you fell in love with, and if you are a man reading this blog, your father was your first Ironman, Superman, Rockstar, that you aspired to be like. Am I right?
So how does the dynamics change when you become a Mom and your partner becomes a Dad? You are both suddenly adulting with all the responsibilities, joys and fear on your shoulder, making sure the life you created or the life that has come in your arms is well protected, nurtured and cared for.
A lot has been said about motherhood and it’s a common belief that motherhood is natural, it’s organic, it comes easily to us Moms. I think we Moms are privileged to feel the mothering emotions easily thanks to all the hormones, gestation, the surrounding, our subconscious learning, and expectations, we mostly know how to Mom once we get a baby. Now think about a man, who just became a Dad.
He is not lactating, he is not getting an extra shot of hormones to exude motherly love & care, and on top of that, everyone around him is already making him nervous, doubting his ability to father. He is made to feel second to the Mom and in most cases, he behaves true to the expectation because of low self-confidence and prejudice.
Then how do you Rock Fatherhood?
I say, Rocking Fatherhood is when a Dad loves his children unconditionally. He cares for his wife and understands what she is going through as a New Mom, as a First Time Mom, as a C-section Mom, as an empty nester, as the mother of a teenager. He lives & feels and bear every parenting moment with her, partnering her at all time and doing his bit like an equal to feed, provide, nurture, play, teach and raise his children. That my friend is an AWESOME DAD!
Dads play an integral part in the life of a child as a role model, teacher, caregiver, and breadwinner. Some dads step into the role of fatherhood easier than others, but all dads who make an effort to be a part of their child’s life are important.
I recently got nominated by the blogging fraternity for the Rocking Motherhood challenge and I blogged about it too. You can read it here. So, since Father’s Day is around the corner, I thought of asking some of my blogger friends, “In what way does their partner Rocks Fatherhood? “What does he do, even better than them when it comes to parenting?
I am so grateful that 6 of my friends and favorite bloggers replied to my question and thanks to them, Now I have a list of 7 ways Dads are rocking Fatherhood. Do read on to see what they said.
- Dad lets his guards down.
Khushboo of Mumzy Notebook says, “I wish I was as carefree as Azmu’s dad when it comes to shopping for her. Her dad spoils her by purchasing whatever his heart desires for her, from clothes, food, toys and encourages her to make choices, while I am the one that’s doing the boring stuff like checking nutritional value at meal times and educational benefits in toys. Just like him, I wish I could learn to let my guard down and let Azmu choose what her little heart desires.
- Dad is ace at fighting toddler tantrum & mommy tantrums
Latika of Stars in the Desert says, “He Handles the tantrums! Well, in my defense, he faces way fewer tantrums than I do since he mostly meets the kids on the weekends only. But his patience is admirable. His parenting starts where mine reaches a difficult point. He can handle my “mommy tantrums” and the kid’s tantrums and make peace fairly easily.
- Dad can be an Absolute Boy with the Boys
Rachel of The Style Therapy says, “I believe it took a male and a female gene to make a baby for a reason. A father and mother bring together their OWN distinct attributes which nurture the unique DNA embedded in their child. I am grateful for the father of my children, the way he can be an absolute boy with my boys. They play rough and tough, which I can’t do. (I am gentler) They have their boy time which is very different from my time with my boys. Their connection with their father is unique which is entirely different from my connection as a mother with them. Do I wish I could be as good as him in this area, actually no? I would never be, as I am me and we are different for a reason? I am just grateful, we get to parent my 2 boys in the best way each of us deems fit.
- Dads don’t over-think, over-analyze. Their parenting is fun & effortless.
Arwa of Slice of Dubai says, “I think what fathers have and we mother lack is the ability to not take themselves too seriously. Fathers & Daughters anyway have a special bond, but what I’d like to learn from my husband is to not overthink every step while raising my daughter. While I spend hours on Baby Center poring over articles on the best developmental Games for my newborn – suitable for her age, the father and daughter are happier ringing chimes and making milk mustaches. While I am still wondering if this is the right age for the 6-month-old to start picking up nursery rhymes, the duo has already developed a language of their own among themselves. And let me tell you, it’s utter gibberish.” She adds, “We mothers worry too much about creating a mess, why they haven’t started crawling yet, comparing ours to other babies of the same age. While we as are busy making young ladies out of our little ones, fathers are taking each day as it comes and bonding over the little joys. And that’s what I’d like to learn from him.”
- Dad has more Patience
Zeyna of Mummy on my mind says, “The one thing I wish I had is his endless amount of patience. My husband, Mr. Z, is an incredibly patient dad to our son, Master Z. Unlike me, he never seems to lose his cool! Also, I love to hear Master Z giggle when he and his father play rough, pretending to wrestle each other to the ground or do some crazy stunts. “
Donne of Mumma Bee Dubai can’t agree more about Dads showing more patience in parenting. She says, “The one thing I truly admire about my husband is his patience. This is something I tend to lack when Leila is having a bad day. My husband is a wonderful father who has all the patience in the world, even spending some nights walking around with her until 2-3am until she falls asleep in his arms.”
- 6. Dads can move mountains
- Harshika of Only one way to find out says, “I wish I was as patient and rock steady as he is. He is one of the most hands-on father I know off, there is very little he says no to, often doing things even without being asked and when it is asked of him, he is likely to move mountains to make it happen.”
- 7. Dad is not just the cheerful helper but he equally shares the emotional burden of Parenting
This one is from me, about the Love of my Love, Life & the little one. “Most Dads get accolades and pat on their pack because they change diapers, or put the baby to sleep or for being the cheerful helper. I think a woman wants more. She needs a partner to share the emotional burden of Parenthood. I appreciate all that too, but what I love the most about my man is that he also shares the emotional burden of parenting. He has been with me to every single inoculation, he sits the night out with me when our child is down with fever, he researched for the best school for her and he does not make me feel like I am carrying the fatigue and emotional burden of caring for a little human on my solo shoulders. He has made this parenting a Team Sport and I truly love him for that.”
Fatherhood is no joke. You’re a banker, a counselor, a coach, a financial adviser, a judge and jury, and a protector all at once. If you’re already a father, you know that all too well. If you aren’t, then the prospect of that becoming a reality is likely as terrifying as it is exciting.
What’s more exciting is to raise the little ones with a Man that awesome. I am sure all the women who contributed in making this article will agree that your love for the person, your faith in your marriage and your joy in life increases when you see your partner bonding with your children, playing with them and caring for them, just like you do, though sometimes even better.
On this Father’s Day, I send hugs and love to the wonderful Dads out there. You are awesome and your wife, your friends and of course your children, love you for that. Keep Rocking at Fatherhood!!
PS: Thanks a lot, Khushboo, Latika, Arwa, Rachel, Donne , Zeyna & Harshika for sharing your voice, experience, and even pictures from your family album with me to bring up this Article on Father’s Day. So much love to you all. Stay blessed ladies.
And you guys, please click on their name and go give their blog a visit and some love. They are all amazing!!